"Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man." Col. 4:6
The phrase, "alway with grace" means graciousness. It also has the idea of the Lord's influence upon our hearts, and its reflection in our life. We know the tongue has incredible power.
A kind word can build you up.
"The tongue of the just is as choice silver: the heart of the wicked is little worth. The lips of the righteous feed many: but fools die for want of wisdom." (Prov 10:20-21)
A mean or hateful word can break your heart!
"And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell." cf Jas. 3:6
This evening, I want to consider How To Speak With Grace.
I. To speak with grace you need grace in your heart.
"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord." cf Col. 3:16
A. Before your speech can be "alway with grace," you need grace in your heart!
"A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh." cf Luke 6:45
1. A person who says kind things, has a kind heart.
2. A person who says negative things, has a negative heart.
3. A person who says mean things, has a mean heart.
B. What's inside comes out!
1. It my come out when we are angry or upset.
2. It may come out all the time.
3. But the source is what is in our hearts.
C. We need to have grace in our hearts:
"And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him." cf Col. 3:17
1. This means with His approval!
2. Would the Lord approve of our speech?
3. To speak in the Name of Jesus, Grace must be in our hearts.
4. No one who curses, swears, lies, gossips, runs others down... is letting the Word of Christ dwell in them richly!
5. We should strive to make this our goal, Whatever we say, say it in the name of the Lord!
D. We'll have a hard time:
1. Yelling at another driver in Jesus' name...
2. Screaming at our kids, in Jesus' name...
3. Saying unkind things to your mate, in Jesus' name ...
II. How to have God's grace in our hearts!
A. Step 1 - True Salvation!
B. Step 2 - Complete Submission!
III. Four Tests of Gracious Speech
A. Is it True? "... seasoned with salt ..."
1. Salt was used for preserving and purifying.
2. Seasoned speech is truthful.
3. Eph 4:15 tells us to Speak the truth in love ...
4. Before we repeat a statement, MAKE SURE IT IS TRUE!!!
5. We tell the parents at school orientation that if they wonít believe everything their children say about us, we wonít believe everything they tell us about them.
6. Just because someone said it doesnít make it true!
7. People can get hurt by our jumping to conclusions!
There once was a dog named August, Who was always jumping at conclusions, One day he jumped at the conclusion of a mule, That was the last day of August!
B. Is it Complete?
1. It is easy to get half of the story.
2. What is said may be true, but it is not complete!
3. Before we say something, we should make sure we get all the story! "He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him." cf Pro. 18:13
C. Is it Necessary?
1. What we say may be true, it may be complete, but is it necessary?
2. Paul said we should speak the truth in LOVE!
"And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins." cf 1 Pet 4:8
3. Some of the most hurtful words I have ever heard have been preceded by the words, "it is the truth."...
4. Just because it is the truth, doesn't make it necessary!
5. There are times when silence truly is golden!
D. Is it Kind?
"Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;" cf Rom 12:10 "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." cf Ep. 4:31-32
IV. Suggestions for speaking with Grace
A. Determine, with Godís help, to control our tongue.
B. Say only good things about others
C. Remember our accountability
"But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment." cf Mt. 12:36
"Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips." cf Psa 141:3 
Our words, what we say tells so much about us!
Note the advertisement:
VERBAL ADVANTAGE: EVERY TIME YOU SPEAK, PEOPLE JUDGE YOU BY THE WORDS YOU USE...
Do our words, build others up, or tear them down? Show the love of Christ or drive them away from our Lord?
"Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man." cf Col. 4:6