## Maintaining a Caring Heart

## John 15:12-17

Listen to the words of an older woman who expressed her loneliness, even within her church. "I sit in the pew next to a warm body every week, but I feel no heat. I'm in the faith, but I draw no active love. I sing the hymns with those next to me, but I hear only my voice. When the service is finished, I leave as I came in--hungry for someone to tell me that I'm a person worth something to somebody. Just a smile would do it, or perhaps some gesture, some sign that I am not a stranger."

Some might initially say, "Well, that is her own fault if she left church feeling that way." Is it, really? Do not we have an obligation to every person who enters this auditorium? No one can live happily without friends. Many who have been hurt in the past may be afraid to risk a close relationship again. Yet we all need friends, and they need us. Friends are necessary, not just for emotional support, but also because there are some responsibilities we simply cannot handle alone. Read article. God never intended for us to "do the job alone".

Jesus, on the eve of His crucifixion, elevated His disciples to the stature of friends. This morning, I want us to consider some of the characteristics of friendship with Christ.

I. The Badge of Friendship is Love (v12-13)

A. Our Assignment.

1. "Love one another, as I have loved you."

2. This is not a suggestion, but it is a commandment.

3. How can Christ command us to love?

a. Some would say that love is an emotion which cannot be turned on and off like a faucet.

b. However, the biblical concept of love is that it is an act of the will.

c. That means that we must choose to love, or not to love if that is the case.

B. Three kinds of love.

1. "EROS" is physical love that often takes but seldom gives.

2. "PHILEO" is affection that gives and takes. ie. Philadelphia the city of brotherly love.

3. "AGAPE" is a sacrificial love that gives and gives some more even when there is no return.

a. A good example is the little girl who held her dolls tightly in her tiny hands and told her mother, "I love them and love them, but they never love me back!"

b. Her mother then asked why it was that she loved the the ugly, ragged dolls so much.

c. The little girl then replied, "If I didn't love them, who would"?

C. What kind of love did Christ display?

1. The "AGAPE" sacrificial kind of love.

2. Calvary was less than 24 hours away when Jesus gave this command to His disciples.

3. He clarified the meaning of His command in v13, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."

D. Are we wearing the "Badge" of friendship?

1. When a policeman wears a badge, we can readily identify that he is a law enforcement officer.

2. John 13:35, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."

3. Do not mistake "sympathy" for love.

a. We can sympathize with someone who has a need.

b. But we cannot say that we love them until we have been sacrificially involved in their need.

4. We are identified as His friends by our obedience to His commands. v14

II. The Reward of Friendship is Intimacy. (v15)

A. No longer bond-servants.

1. A bond-servant was like a slave.

2. They did what they were told, whether they understood the purpose of the work or not

3. They were very often considered as tools to achieve the aims of someone else.

4. They were not considered intelligent enough to appreciate what their master was planning.

5. They were not permitted to eat at the same table as their masters.

6. They usually had separate living quarters, and were never invited to participate in family discussions.

B. Now they were FRIENDS!

1. The distinction of between slave and friend was one of intimacy.

2. They were, and we are, included in His plans.

3. We are not following blindly, God has revealed His purpose within His Word.

4. Our relationship as friends means that we have a very special relationship with Him that every- one doesn't enjoy.

5. NOTE: Ps. 25:14, "The secret of the Lord is with them that fear him: and he will shew them his covenant."

C. Can your relationship with Christ be characterized by the word "Intimate"?

1. Is Jesus Christ your best friend?

a. One teenage girl wrote, "I like to tell my problems to Jesus because He doesn't tell anyone else what I say to Him."

b. She discovered that He is one friend who can be trusted, who is always willing to listen, and who will never betray us.

2. The Scripture puts it this way, "...there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother."

III. The Basis of Friendship is Christ's Choice. (v16-17)

A. Friends must be chosen.

1. Jesus made it very clear to the disciples that their relationship was based on His choice and not theirs.

2. Often we hear someone speak about when they found Christ, when in reality Christ found them.

3. Our choice of Him is only a response to His initiative and work.

4. 1 John 4:19, "We love him, because he first loved us."

B. Christ chose us for a purpose.

1. That purpose is fruit-bearing.

2. Remember, we said earlier that bearing fruit was the expression outwardly of the inner nature.

3. As believers, indwelt by the Holy Spirit, the fruit of the Spirit should be exhibited in our lives.

4. Which in turn will result in our involvement is seeing others come to know Christ.

5. The promise of answered prayer is again attached to the condition of being fruitful.

C. Are we fulfilling the purpose for which Christ has chosen us?

1. Jesus repeats the command in v17.

2. Do we have a loving and caring heart?

3. Before we can be a true friend to others, we must develop our friendship with Christ.

a. This takes time.

b. It will take trust.

c. Also there will be trials.