## Accepting Responsibility

## Ephesians 5:15

- Justice Lewis Brandeis, a Supreme Court justice from 1916-1939 said, "Responsibility is the great developer." It builds your character. It's what helps you grow.
- Winston Churchill called it, "The price of greatness."
- If we want to do something great with our lives we have to become responsible people.

We are talking about building our lives on values that last, and responsibility is the foundation. If we don't get this one, we may as well forget the rest of the series because we can't build any of the other values into our lives if we don't personally accept responsibility for our choices, our character, and our values.

It's obvious that in recent years there's been a decline in the acceptance of personal responsibility in our society. Nobody wants to accept responsibility for anything anymore. In fact, we want to accuse and excuse. We want to accuse other people -- it's all their fault -- and we want to excuse ourselves -- it's not my fault. What causes that?

Three Foes of Personal Responsibility

- The 'rights' mentality: I demand my rights

- "I have my rights! and that's all I'm interested in." We have criminal rights, computer rights, animal rights, children's rights, victim's rights, abortion rights, housing rights, privacy rights, homosexual rights, the right to own an AK 47 for hunting purposes, the right to not be tested for aids and the right to not inform anybody if we have been infected. One lawmaker suggested that along with our Bill of Rights what we really need is a Bill of Responsibilities. Of course we know we already have one. It's called the Word of God.

- The 'victim' mentality: It's not my fault

- "None of my problems are my fault. In fact, they're all your fault." We blame. You spell blame, b-lame. Every time we blame somebody else for the unhappiness in our life, we are being lame. Here are some examples:
- An FBI agent embezzles $2000 from the government and then he loses it all in an afternoon of gambling in Atlantic City. He's fired but he wins reinstatement after a court rules that his affinity for gambling with other people's money is `a handicap' and thus, as a handicap, it is protected under Federal law.
- Fired for consistently showing up late at work, a former school district employee sues his former employers arguing that he is the victim of what his lawyer calls Chronic Lateness Syndrome.
- In Framingham, Massachusetts a young man steals a car from a parking lot and is killed while driving it. His family then sues the proprietor of the parking lot for failing to take steps to prevent such thefts. ("It's your fault that I stole the car.")
- A man who, by his own admission, has exposed himself between 10,000 and 20,000 times and then, convicted of flashing on more than 30 occasions, is turned down for a job as a park attendant in Dane County, Wisconsin, because of his arrest record. But he sues on the grounds that he never exposed himself in a park, only in libraries and Laundromats. The Wisconsin employment officials, ever accommodating to the expansion of human rights, agree to make an initial determination of probable cause that the flasher was the victim of "illegal job discrimination".

- The 'entitlement' mentality: I deserve it

- "I deserve it. The world owes me a living." Where does this kind of thinking originate? Our own federal government basically says, "We'll take care of you from cradle to grave" and we have people saying, "I have a right not to work," so therefore you should pay me to not work.
- (Ephesians 5:15) See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,

It shouldn't surprise us to discover that God's Word instructs us on how we are to live, and it doesn't line up with any of the three ways that we have discussed. Instead, we are called upon to live responsibly! Paul said, "…not as fools, but as wise." So there are basically two ways to live this life. As wise = which means responsibly or as fools = which means irresponsibly. Once again, we get to make the choice. As we have said before, our behavior is based upon the values we choose for our lives. Let's consider some principles about living our lives in a responsible manner.

I. Why Live Responsibly?

A. Because God is watching my life.

(Hebrews 4:13) Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.

1. This should be a realization of truth rather than just a reason to live responsibly.

2. God placed us here for a purpose…to glorify Him and to become like Him in our character.

3. We play games with God when we think that He is not aware of what we do, say, or think.

4. Nothing is hidden from Him, and one day we will give an accounting to Him.

(Romans 14:12) So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.

5. What will God be looking for when He evaluates the way we have lived our lives?

a. He won't be considering our great achievements, our bank account, or our education.

b. He's interested in our character, how we lived the life that He gave to us.

c. I had the privilege to be present at the birth of both my sons, and as different as they are, they both came into this world naked with nothing in their hands! That is true of every one of us.

d. According to the Word of God, that is the way we will leave this world as well.

(Job 1:21) And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.

6. God has made an investment in us, and He expects a return on His investment.

7. Are we responsible? Do we use our time, our money, our influence, our mind, our relationships, our opportunities and all of the things He gives us wisely or do we use them selfishly?

Daniel Webster once said, "The most important idea I ever thought was the day I realized that I am personally and individually accountable to God for how I lived."

B. Because others are affected by my life.

(1 Corinthians 10:24) Let no man seek his own, but every man another's wealth.

1. None of us lives to ourselves alone, we are all interdependent.

2. We're not independent or dependent but interdependent on each other.

3. This verse tells us that we should be concerned about others and not just about ourselves.

a. Billy Joel sang, "I don't care what they say! This is my life."

b. Sammy Davis, Jr. sang, "I've got to be me!"

c. Frank Sinatra sang, "I did it my way!"

4. The basic idea behind these type of songs are I live my life the way I want to and what's it to you?

a. If it doesn't hurt you or you don't know about it, who cares?

b. It's my life and it doesn't matter what I do because it doesn't affect you.

c. The problem is that's wrong!

d. Every decision we make affects somebody else; we may not see the visible results but every time we're irresponsible it has an impact on someone around us.

e. A man can say, "I can get away with this. My wife will never know. I can do this and it won't hurt my wife."

f. Kids can say, "I can do this and it won't hurt my parents."

g. An employee can say, "I can do this. It's a big company. It won't hurt anybody."

h. Wrong!!!

C. Because God will reward my life.

1. God desires to bless us tremendously.

a. Satan's lie was to convince Eve that God was withholding something good from her.

b. We know that isn't true! He was only seeking to protect her.

c. God truly wants to bless us.

(Psalms 84:11) For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly.

2. One of the ways God rewards us when we are responsible is He gives us greater responsibility.

(Luke 12:48b) "…For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more."

3. Why should God give us more when we're not responsible with what we've got right now?

4. But if we will be responsible He will bless us in ways we can't imagine.

(Malachi 3:10) Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.

II. How Can We Become More Responsible?

A. By practicing good stewardship

(Proverbs 21:20) There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.

1. God says if we're not saving any of our money for the future, we are being foolish.

2. We are living irresponsibly.

3. The Scripture tells us that wise have wealth because they haven't spent it up!

Somebody asked John D. Rockefeller who at one time was the world's wealthiest man, "How did you amass such a fortune?" He said, "It's real simple. I give the fist ten percent as a tithe back to God. I save ten percent. And I live on the other 80%."

4. Like it or not, God uses money to test us and to see if we will be responsible.

5. When we stand before God, He is going to say, "Were you responsible with what I gave you here on earth?"

B. By controlling my reactions

1. We cannot control events, circumstances, and tragedies that happen to us.

2. But we can control our response and reaction to those circumstances.

3. How do we react? Many immediately begin to whine and complain. Some become angry and say things they will later regret.

(Proverbs 29:11) A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.

4. We need to think before we speak; that's being responsible.

5. Another way we show responsibility is by not trying to get even with people who hurt us

6. "I don't get mad, I get even!" that is not the responsible way to react.

7. But when we say, "God, I'm going to let You take care of it. I know You're going to settle the score and I trust You to do that." that puts us in the right and responsible place.

(Proverbs 24:29) Say not, I will do so to him as he hath done to me: I will render to the man according to his work.

(Romans 12:17) Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.

(Romans 12:19) Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

(Romans 12:21) Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. 8. The key to responsibility is learning to control our emotional reactions.

C. By guarding my mind

1. What separates us from the animals is that God has given us a mind.

2. We are challenged to protect or guard our minds.

(Proverbs 23:7a) "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he… "

3. Our minds control everything else.

4. Our thoughts, affect our feelings, and our feelings affect our actions.

5. Some people pride themselves on being open-minded, but their minds need to be closed for repairs!

(Romans 12:1-2) I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

6. Paul tells us the to be transformed is through the renewing of our minds.

a. The word 'renewing' means renovation.

b. We need an 'extreme makeover' when it comes to our minds.

(Proverbs 15:14) The heart of him that hath understanding seeketh knowledge: but the mouth of fools feedeth on foolishness.

7. Some folks say, "I never have any desire to read the Bible."

8. Why is that? Because they've filled their mind with trash rather than truth.

9. We need to guard our minds concerning what we put into them; that is one way of becoming more responsible.

D. By admitting my mistakes

1. When we make mistakes, we need to admit to it, and deal with it biblically.

2. God's answer to sin is to confess, repent, and be forgiven.

3. Once forgiven, we need to move on for God.

4. Too often rather than admitting, we want to blame someone else.

5. Who do we think we are kidding? We are all sinners!

(Romans 3:23-24) For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus:

6. When we fail to accept responsibility and admit to our mistakes, we will not prosper.

(Proverbs 28:13) He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.

7. Sometimes we feel so guilty and ashamed over stupid decisions or irresponsible behavior that our guilt and shame actually perpetuates the problem.

a. We keep doing what's causing the problem.

b. Example of me and diets.

1) I blow it and then I think what's the use in even trying?

2) I only make my situation worse!

3) I will go off for days, sometimes weeks.

4) It becomes a cycle of failure.

c. The same thing happens with sin.

1) I am bad.

2) Since I'm bad, I'm going to blow it again.

3) I feel ashamed, but I cannot break the cycle

4) The guilt and the shame actually keeps us locked in a lifestyle of irresponsibility making one dumb decision after another.

d. What we need is a power beyond ourselves.

e. What we need is to admit our sin and deal with it the Bible way.

(1 John 1:9) If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.